When one of my half-sisters was small, she would communicate ignorance by saying "I just can't know" instead of "I just don't know." That memory just popped into my head as I opened this blank blog entry to post about something that just occurred to me: I just can't care about other people's interests.
I recently signed up for Compatible Partners, and, as I read through my matches' profiles, I was struck by their dull. At first, I saw this as confirmation of how boring people are in general, being that I've had the same experience on every dating or social networking website I've ever been on. Then, it occurred to me that maybe the issue hinges on who I am, rather than who they are; maybe I'm not only not interested in what other people have to say about themselves and their interests, but that perhaps I can't be interested. Maybe I'm just too profoundly introverted, too inside of and full of myself to be touched by their self-expression.
I don't really believe that this is true. I think that it's possible for me to be interested, but that the sort of profile content I'd be interested in is probably representative of only a very few people, being rather technical in the impersonal domain and unusually individualistic in the personal domain, and I therefore simply rarely come across it. I also must remember that I'm rather doomed to be unable to relate to most people's concerns because of my overriding philosophy of life, which creates a rather antagonistic relationship, not only with my own culture, but with culture itself, whereas other people seem to be quite embedded in culture.
It's become a bit trying, actually. I'm spread all over the Internet, trying to find someone to talk to about my various obscure concerns. There's no where I can go to find them all. I regret stomping out of an extremely rare find of a forum in a huff shortly after joining, an occurrence which was all the more bitter because of the uncharacteristicness (is that a word?) of such conduct. On the other hand, I cringe inwardly when I think of the drama that may have ensued had I more time to reveal my apparently eccentric communication style. AC is where I feel safest expressing myself, and so AC is what I stick with, but it doesn't touch many fundamental parts of who I am...I don't know how to explain, and I give up. This is long enough already.
So I'm looking for a bigger slice of my everything on Compatible Partners.
I recently signed up for Compatible Partners, and, as I read through my matches' profiles, I was struck by their dull. At first, I saw this as confirmation of how boring people are in general, being that I've had the same experience on every dating or social networking website I've ever been on. Then, it occurred to me that maybe the issue hinges on who I am, rather than who they are; maybe I'm not only not interested in what other people have to say about themselves and their interests, but that perhaps I can't be interested. Maybe I'm just too profoundly introverted, too inside of and full of myself to be touched by their self-expression.
I don't really believe that this is true. I think that it's possible for me to be interested, but that the sort of profile content I'd be interested in is probably representative of only a very few people, being rather technical in the impersonal domain and unusually individualistic in the personal domain, and I therefore simply rarely come across it. I also must remember that I'm rather doomed to be unable to relate to most people's concerns because of my overriding philosophy of life, which creates a rather antagonistic relationship, not only with my own culture, but with culture itself, whereas other people seem to be quite embedded in culture.
It's become a bit trying, actually. I'm spread all over the Internet, trying to find someone to talk to about my various obscure concerns. There's no where I can go to find them all. I regret stomping out of an extremely rare find of a forum in a huff shortly after joining, an occurrence which was all the more bitter because of the uncharacteristicness (is that a word?) of such conduct. On the other hand, I cringe inwardly when I think of the drama that may have ensued had I more time to reveal my apparently eccentric communication style. AC is where I feel safest expressing myself, and so AC is what I stick with, but it doesn't touch many fundamental parts of who I am...I don't know how to explain, and I give up. This is long enough already.
So I'm looking for a bigger slice of my everything on Compatible Partners.
