So, how autistic are you?
And by that, I like to delve a bit deeper into situation and comfort level.
I remember that years ago, and I'm talking +10 years ago, autism in general didn't occur to me to be a label that would fit me. I had my own mannerisms, got into some trouble here and there, but I was just "me".
Now, if I look at my current situation, and especially my living situation. I live at my parents house, I have a fairly sized room where I sleep. I also have my tv there, my computer, my instruments, my coffeemachine and a comfy leather seat. People once jokingly said "you're only missing out on a fridge". Yes, that, and perhaps a shower and a sink and such. But in general my bedroom is like a living room. With that being said, here's a few things that don't make me need prescription meds to deal with daily life at home;
- No one comes barging in my room unannounced. If my parents need me, they are fine with waiting until I'm downstairs for whatever reason and they'll ask me.
- My room is at the backside of the house and there's a garden, so I don't have the exposure of cars driving by, nor the noise of passing traffic
- The house is isolated fairly well so noise in the house in general is to a minimum. Add in that the living room is at the front of the house, so I'm not sleeping above it.
- Rollerblinds so I don't have to deal with sun/day light.
- There is a huge ceiling fan on my ceiling, so that keeps temperature ok; and the hum makes it for good noise canceling for the small sounds the household might make.
That's 5 points, where I can of which I can tell they'd annoy me a lot more if I were exposed to them. Unexpected situations, noises, lights, temperature are a summary.
People might conclude "well, you're good then... people apparently helped you set up a situation to keep sane on a daily basis." Apart from my parents paying bills and the house being their own, the situation (or in this way, the stuff NOT happening) isn't adapted to what I need. It's just how it works for them, and how it works for me. Me holing up in this living environment was way before I got a diagnosis, or even thought about autism.
If I keep my personal situation all ok, and then enter a world of education and employment, no wonder there's a lot of issues to be had. It's not really naive here, but somehow... I either never adapted to those sensory issues or I just can't deal with them flat out. The latter proved to be the issue through a therapist almost at age 30.
So looking at it, how autistic are you in your own personal (and presumably safe) environment? And also, how could someone "see" if something is wrong if one is living in a "sane" environment for him without him being put there on purpose but rather just "the way it went".
I think, this is a big analogy to a lot of stuff in my life. Yes, perhaps I have good karma (heck; my bread never felt on the buttered side either)... but a lot of situation I apparently ran into did fit my needs without expressing my needs. For what it's worth the girl/woman I was with for 8,5 years of my life in terms of a relationship might have been on the spectrum, more so cause I'm seeing a lot of stuff in me, that I saw in her as well. I never discussed autism with her, but even in that situation I was at my top comfy level.
However; the shadowside of it all is, yes, I've had some ugly situations. And those were the situation were I couldn't deal with life. I went in and out of therapists office enough to at least have a high score on FourSquare (if they'd add those places as locations in that "game"). I went there for depression, suicide threats, stuff like that yet everytime it turned out that it was just "a bad situation at the moment". Yes of course it is! I was having a major meltdown! Those situations are always "just a moment", they're not clinical. They usually turn out fine if I have enough time and space to collect myself at a place where I feel good. That place is my room, where I'm free of sensory stimuli that annoy the F out of me.
So really, how autistic are you in the correct environment?
And by that, I like to delve a bit deeper into situation and comfort level.
I remember that years ago, and I'm talking +10 years ago, autism in general didn't occur to me to be a label that would fit me. I had my own mannerisms, got into some trouble here and there, but I was just "me".
Now, if I look at my current situation, and especially my living situation. I live at my parents house, I have a fairly sized room where I sleep. I also have my tv there, my computer, my instruments, my coffeemachine and a comfy leather seat. People once jokingly said "you're only missing out on a fridge". Yes, that, and perhaps a shower and a sink and such. But in general my bedroom is like a living room. With that being said, here's a few things that don't make me need prescription meds to deal with daily life at home;
- No one comes barging in my room unannounced. If my parents need me, they are fine with waiting until I'm downstairs for whatever reason and they'll ask me.
- My room is at the backside of the house and there's a garden, so I don't have the exposure of cars driving by, nor the noise of passing traffic
- The house is isolated fairly well so noise in the house in general is to a minimum. Add in that the living room is at the front of the house, so I'm not sleeping above it.
- Rollerblinds so I don't have to deal with sun/day light.
- There is a huge ceiling fan on my ceiling, so that keeps temperature ok; and the hum makes it for good noise canceling for the small sounds the household might make.
That's 5 points, where I can of which I can tell they'd annoy me a lot more if I were exposed to them. Unexpected situations, noises, lights, temperature are a summary.
People might conclude "well, you're good then... people apparently helped you set up a situation to keep sane on a daily basis." Apart from my parents paying bills and the house being their own, the situation (or in this way, the stuff NOT happening) isn't adapted to what I need. It's just how it works for them, and how it works for me. Me holing up in this living environment was way before I got a diagnosis, or even thought about autism.
If I keep my personal situation all ok, and then enter a world of education and employment, no wonder there's a lot of issues to be had. It's not really naive here, but somehow... I either never adapted to those sensory issues or I just can't deal with them flat out. The latter proved to be the issue through a therapist almost at age 30.
So looking at it, how autistic are you in your own personal (and presumably safe) environment? And also, how could someone "see" if something is wrong if one is living in a "sane" environment for him without him being put there on purpose but rather just "the way it went".
I think, this is a big analogy to a lot of stuff in my life. Yes, perhaps I have good karma (heck; my bread never felt on the buttered side either)... but a lot of situation I apparently ran into did fit my needs without expressing my needs. For what it's worth the girl/woman I was with for 8,5 years of my life in terms of a relationship might have been on the spectrum, more so cause I'm seeing a lot of stuff in me, that I saw in her as well. I never discussed autism with her, but even in that situation I was at my top comfy level.
However; the shadowside of it all is, yes, I've had some ugly situations. And those were the situation were I couldn't deal with life. I went in and out of therapists office enough to at least have a high score on FourSquare (if they'd add those places as locations in that "game"). I went there for depression, suicide threats, stuff like that yet everytime it turned out that it was just "a bad situation at the moment". Yes of course it is! I was having a major meltdown! Those situations are always "just a moment", they're not clinical. They usually turn out fine if I have enough time and space to collect myself at a place where I feel good. That place is my room, where I'm free of sensory stimuli that annoy the F out of me.
So really, how autistic are you in the correct environment?
