I feel the need to keep venting some typical daily things i'm struggling with lately so hope nobody minds! This one is a fairly common issue that i always sort of presumed would never happen to me but has..
So i have the whole aspie texture food thing(it's complicated to explain), When i was younger i originally would only ever eat one bowl of cereal and NOTHING else at all, had therapy for it and such for years, Luckily as i got older my taste buds changed or something and i tried new foods and eventually was able to eat more things such as bread, pot noodle however that's the main issue, My texture issue and everything will only really allow me to eat junk food, I can't eat a proper 'dinner' or anything healthy really as i'm super super fussy, I can try foods absolutely no problem, It's not like i don't try anything i am willing to try anything just i can't find anything healthy to eat that i like as it makes me sick to force the food i don't like, and being someone who is indoors 24/7 over time this became an issue, When i do discover a new food i am absolutely over the moon and excited but as i've managed to find a good amount of junk food i DO like.. and being stuck indoors 24/7 with depression, I over-eat that junk because it's exciting as i grew up basically eating nothing at all except small bits.
Over time i found things i did like such as Pizza not that long ago and what i was missing out on.. I'm so glad i can eat all this new stuff but having got so excited over it and it helping cheer me up, Well over the years i developed this weird food addiction i'm currently at an 'obese' level because i can't seem stop, The first half of the day i'm not really too hungry then it'll hit 3pm and this starvation thing starts kicking in, I can go eat but it doesn't really.. do much and as the day goes on and it gets later i even get like shakes over hunger? It's really silly but i guess food addiction is a much more serious thing that i thought, If i diet i get some serious withdrawal stuff that happens, I get cranky, super shakey and feel like i'm honestly trying to quit a hardcore addiction, I don't starve myself on a diet either, It seems that just the very thought of it is what sets me off, But i am not giving up, I try to diet all the time and find the right way for me as a person to do it as i can't do it the tradition way with exercise and greens, I hate literally all greens and can't exercise much(Though i do small bits when i can)
As i don't go out much and don't move around much due to social phobia and restrictions i'm already terrified of my own health and such so this diet thing i'm extremely determined to do if i can somehow, I'm currently on day 2 as i write this and it hasn't gone too bad yet so hopefully i'm in the right mind for it over fear of health finally. I will make another post soon with my progress because i do want to healthy somewhat to the best i can and i have the means to do so it's just a matter of willpower at this point, I can diet by eating things such as Weetabix and Tomato soup as long as i'm under that 1900 calorie a day i should be okay, I've also cut off sodas and such and am currently drinking as healthy as i can.
Dropping the weight might be the okay part as i have done it before howeeever, When i reached my goal i started instantly putting it back on due to generally what i can eat is all junk so i need to plan for that too. Wish me luck!
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