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Been gone a while!

By Aru · Oct 19, 2019 ·
  1. Hello friends! Been a while since i came on here, I've just been trying to fix some life things and everything has been pretty decent, I set out into making some friends and repairing old ones, I branched out across Twitch (A gaming livestream site) and made a bunch of really good friends who always check up on me, So i've been happier. I still struggle to livestream due to social phobia but i don't think that will ever improve i'm just happy i can do it somewhat.

    Love is a complicated issue for me still, I've had a few people try to get close to me and each time i always push them away, I'm still worried that if i get into a relationship my autism need for space will trigger and i'll suffocate. I don't really want to put anyone through that but at the same time it would be NICE to date. It's just this never-ending worry i have since my last proper relationship still. I think i'm a little broken on it all now. If by some miracle there is someone who would be willing to put up with a lot of stress over that then great but i wouldn't ever expect that from anyone.

    Medication has been a bit tricky, I've been on anti-depressants for most of my life now and i recently changed 2 years ago to ones that help with sleep too because my brain wouldn't stop at night, They do help to sleep but i have developed extreme nightmares every night on them which can be a bit exhausting after so long but i guess it's worth it in the long run.

    Other than all that life has been okay :) I'm 'content' at the current time and will post more in the future!

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