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Asperger's & Autism Forum
I accepted it when I was in my 20s. Now that I am 43 years old and seeing my friends and family forum relationships and get married or hanging out with couples as they are everywhere I accept I will never have a girlfriend or be married.
So since I accept it, and it does hurt especially when seeing couples like my friends who are couples its hard. The very few single girls are single by choice as they don't want a relationship.
I am also tired of being hurt as any slim chance was crushed in March 2020 when the lockdown then distancing measures happened. It's hard to forum relationships virtually actually it's a complete waste of time.
Now one of my friends is getting married, but I am not going to bother to attend the wedding if there will still be one with lockdowns but anyway I have been too enough of them to feel even more crummy.
I’m wondering if anyone else categorizes their life through the different special interests they’ve had. I think about it a lot. How all of the different interests I’ve had in my life are all interconnected, yet have a distinct phase on their own.
For example, I’ve always loved video games, but depending on what games I played at the time I can tell you what age I was and why I liked it. So at 11 I really liked sonic the hedgehog until about 13, at which point I was really interested in other Sega games, like NiGHTS or Crazy Taxi. That lead me into racing games at around 15, (which also lead to watching Initial D) and two years later I got really into Tetris. Of course, there were many smaller interests along the way, but because all of my interests are somehow interconnected, I can trace them back to a certain point in my life.
In the end, all of my interests connect with other significant events in my life. I really got into video games when I was in school because I felt...
I am having some trouble finding research and personal narratives about internalized distress from childhood onward. So, a natural tendency towards silence, not one borne of masking. A loud expression of distress is one feature of autism I have never resonated with. My distress feels more stuck, and certainly more silent, than loud. When I was little I'd sort of phase out and disconnect from my distress. I called it "floating", even though I wasn't on the ceiling or a ghost or anything. I was just...porous, I guess.
When grown-ups called me a "little peacemaker", I came to appreciate my detachment and saw it as a way to not be bothersome to anyone, and thus to be more or less free to do my own thing, which was basically my plan all along. My middle childhood was chaotic, but even as a baby, I appeared weirdly unresponsive to anything, yet also subversive in my activity. The kid who does what they want without saying a thing. That was me. It's still me, in a lot of ways,...
What do you do, to calm your throat from waking up with acid in your mouth?
I used to be able to drink some milk and that would be fairly instant in calming my throat, but since I had my gallbladder removed, I tried some and was sick and been frightened to have some again, because I hate being sick.
A lot of aspies talk about special interests. What would be a good definition of it?
Some, including Tony Atwood, talk about how a special interest could be a thought blocker and an escape from what is difficult in life. This does not work for me as reality always kicks in when I practise my interests. I can even get very frustrated as things can be difficult. How can a special interest be an escape from reality? Practising music doesn't exactly takw me away from my difficulties. Maybe Tony Atwood refers to things line video game as it doesn't require any skills (but even that seems false)?
I've honesty never met another autistic person with a special interest in meerkats. Well just meerkats. I know someone else who claims they may be autistic but also likes the other mongooses. But then I've never met an NT with even a casual interest in meerkats. I got cyber bullied on a Lion King fan fourm (my other special interest at the time), I kinda leaned just because someone claims to have something in common with me doesn't mean they actually do, or at least not to the extent I do. Meerkats have essentially become my identity. "Meerkat Queen" is actually my nickname among a few people who know me personally. Now I just need a signature clothing style set and Netflix series.
My daughter got her official HF ASD diagnosis just before xmas , she is 13 , we knew it was coming for the last few months , she has had noticeable mental health issues since eleven years of age . She masks a lot , struggles with school interactions and has been missing a lot of school . But since her diagnosis she has shut down , hasn't left her bed in days , won't talk about it , can't sleep , won't even interact with her family and is suffering anxiety and dizzy spell . She hasnt left the house all xmas . Keeps saying she wants to move country or die .
I am sick with worry . She is seeing a therapist . I want to know how to help her . Is this normal on the back of a diagnosis ? I know I can't push her but I need to help bring her out of this depressive episode . She is not interested in reading about her condition or engaging in with others on forums . She doesn't really have any real friends or special interests . She use to read a lot but stopped that when pandemic...
Hello I’m new, and I’m having a bit of a crisis. I feel very confused and quite upset as I don’t know what to do. I know that this year has not been great for everyone, and I do understand that maybe my friend (disabled but NT)whom I have known since first year university may also be feeling overwhelmed by what the year has brought into her life but... I feel like she’s been avoiding me.
We haven’t had a proper conversation...as in she’s constantly active on the computer for most of the day due to her being house bound,,,and more so now because of the More stringent lockdown in her country. Nothing really has changed that much for her as she doesn’t work and only socializes online even before Covid.
I understand that maybe she has things to deal with herself. But...when she’s been online she’s not responding to my messages, and when she does it’s been pretty sparse. It started to decrease in activity from July, and then sporadically until the last message I received from her...
Throughout my Christmas with my parents, my mother could literally not go two minutes without making commentary about how much she wished I would shave my beard off. I keep my beard well groomed and well maintained, but she made it perfectly clear that she wants me to be her Ken doll and that she believes I should not have a beard at all.
Earlier today, I told her I would not shave it off. She replied by saying that I was the only person who was making a big deal out of it. What a narcissist she is.
There is no way to talk reason with people like this. They reject reason when it gets in the way of what they want. I cannot confront her about anything she says or does, because she will respond with lying to my face and telling me I remember things differently than they actually happened. I cannot win with her.
Hypothesis: Modern humans use the emotional mechanism that was originally developed to regulate the behavior of children versus adults to regulate the behavior of people in hierarchies. Aspergers are to emotionally adult to fit in.
I am a bipolar women– I have strong emotions which switch back from very happy to very sad. I have a high IQ too. I know from my friends that the Asperger can focus much better and especially longer on a task than me. So if there is someone interested in evolution I wonder if he could help me to order my thoughts and find error?
I have some hypothesis of how the difference between Asperger, bipolar people and primary psychopaths roughly came about in evolutionary terms.
My main intention is to stop the psychopaths because I think they represent an unfavorable (and pretty dumb) line of evolution that is unluckily winning now.
When it comes to Aspergers I have the opposite instinct, although I really don't understand them very well yet.
I made a...
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