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Asperger's & Autism Forum
Hope I am not a time waster. I am in the UK
I have had two asperger's tests one in 2006 and one in 2015, I stupidly used drugs at the time of both interviews.
I taught myself to read as a toddler but gave up because my Dad was narcissistic and his approval was more important.
I can sing perfect pitch.
I cant recognise faces I am face blind.
I lost the letter from 2015 telling me that I did not have Aspergers but GP emailed me a copy to day.
It says I can socially function and have empathy, but I don't.
I was on poly drugs when doing the interviews with the autism assessor and alcohol.
I used drugs to cope with difficult life socially.
I am useless socially bullied, no friends, abused but not blaming anyone its the choices I made.
I cannot cope with the demands of being a neurotypical, but I don't know if I will be allowed a third one.
The letter says I have social imagination, good gestures and eye contact but I think this is because I was high when I was interviewed.
I think I do need a wheelchair, an electric wheelchair/cart with some kind of basket/carrying space and do much, though not all, of my walking with it. Of course, I'd really have to have a place to do so.
I just walk so painfully slow at times, so crippled am I. It can take me forty-five minutes or so to walk three blocks. My legs, now, often hurt a lot from being strained. I had thought I would try to get an apartment of some sort from Social Services and supplement living with that money, handled by the " Gale Gordon " lawyer I mentioned, to live decently. But, it has not happened yet.
I pictured myself bringing in those books. Etc. I have in storage in Santa Cruz and those things from my brother out here and living with them, having a collection of my own at last.
I am a 19 year old aspie boy who has few friends outside family and I am a huge introvert who plays wow classic and browses the web frequently so I have been thinking of online dating and finding a friend and so I registered on the swedish dating service called happy pancake.
I recently found a really cute girl on there who is 21-22 years old , I have sent her a long and detailed message to her describing myself along with my interests and what she needs to know about me.
I have never tried dating online or in real life so I am not too knowledgeable on the subject.
The only issue is that she lives quite far away from my home region but as long as I can keep contact with her during my last year of high school I should be fine and then once I have finished high school I might meet her in real life.
She is probably a neurotypical too so I am not too sure what I should be thinking of when dating to make things turn out good.
I have a few thoughts as well when it comes to having a...
I gave no Aspie friends. I don't think I've ever had any real face-to-face relationship with someone I knew to be Aspie/AS. (There is a close Aspie friend of mine whom I've never met) I've never gone, with regularity and gratification, to any AS social/support groups.
When I have gone I haven't fit in. I'm older than most people who go to such groups And my economic/social status makes me an outsider. When I've gone to groups, they amounted to restaraunts afterward - I didn't have the money for that. And was too scruffy, and had to carry things, and maybe had to show back up afterwards and couldn't hang around.
I was wondering how many of you have come out as openly autistic. Do you have a blog, a You Tube Channel etc.? Are you comfortable identifying yourself publicly as autistic? I was diagnosed four years ago and have only told a handful of my closest family and one or two others. I wonder if I was braver, and blogged openly as an Aspie for example, I would feel more at easy with myself. I am fifty four now and so have spent most of my life as undiagnosed, as feeling like an utter failure at life. Perhaps 'coming out' is an important step towards self acceptance. What do you think?
It's like having a life long scab. I've spent most of my life tugging at it in a hesitant manner. Perhaps it's time to rip it off. Perhaps I have to expose the wound before any real healing can take place?
I hope everyone is doing well?
The last few weeks have been really hard. I’ve been getting pains, some I’d say are mild and others can be really severe and knock the wind out of me and leave me feeling lousy all day long. The pains vary in pain but are with me every single day. They can be in my head, chest, stomach or pelvic area and they can be very uncomfortable. I’ve also been feeling very tired and off my food. I ate the other day and within half an hour bad stomach pain and feeling very unwell which lasted until the afternoon the next day. Luckily that’s only happened the once so far and I’m hoping it won’t repeat. I’m thinking it might be anxiety but I am also wondering if it’s Autism related. Has anyone else ever experienced this before? It’s not pleasant and I’m getting fed up with the pain and lousy feeling now
On a happier note though, I’ve patched things up with my mum and we’re talking again So I am super happy about that!
Take care everyone.
Social oddities/manipulation based on wanting certain social input/output - sort of devil's advocacyOK. I'm a scientific guy and among things that generate hypothetical wanderings in me are people.
While I am not malicious in my lies towards others (let's not get into a life is not a zero sum game angle which is interesting but too divergent for the topic) I tend to probe people as they are some sort of test subjects. I might lie about myself to see if I was correct in my hypothetical assumptions. This is about building a dataset out from people like forming massive correlations. It gets very rewarding when you hit the nail again and again. In a way this is like shooting my leg in name of science. Kind of masochistic sometimes in terms of self-treatment.
When I was in the diagnostic interview I just couldn't help myself. I wanted to learn more about autism indirectly because I haven't heard of it so I told lies in terms understanding what they were getting at and following their reactions. I just wanted to know what they were getting towards and what it wasn't. Like...
I have always been very vocal about my political beliefs on my facebook page, where I'm friends with most of my partner's family. About 2 months ago, one of them commented on an image I shared stating their disagreement. I replied politely and tried to be as diplomatic as possible but she then blocked me. I didn't become aware of this until a few weeks later when I noticed that both her and her daughter had removed me from their friend's list. I made a status venting my frustration because I have had people fall out with me multiple times in the past over simply stating my opinion or my feelings and as an autistic person this is really hard. I have hyperempathy and this is why I have the political beliefs I have, but whenever I try to be empathetic, polite and honest I get punished for it. I did not refer to them directly and the entire status was about my past experience, not them. This led to me having a severe meltdown. I have been ostracised a lot in the past and have...
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