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Asperger's & Autism Forum
Ok, so generally, being anxious is for nothing, ie as soon as the thing that one is anxious is over, the anxiety disappears, but I have always just felt a sense of relief.
Had a letter come through the post to say that someone from the electricity board is coming over today ( sent a couple of week's ago). I moan, because of dreading these visits; just hate people coming to my home, but they do tend to come first thing in the morning and are really good about leaving prompto - until today.
I mean: come on! The time stated was between: 12 noon and 4 pm. I guess it is due to visiting everyone and so, that is why the horrible hours. The thing is, I have been on high anxiety ALL DAY and guess what? He or she did not turn up! I seriously been panicking and not getting a lot done, because I hate the idea of being "caught". I need to feel a sense of control, since I jump a mile, when the door bell rings.
I have wasted an entire day and feel sooo angry and frustrated.
Catch-22. Where you're "damned if you do, damned if you don't". With two considerations of autism:
Being mind-blind and essentially unaware or indifferent of the feelings or perception of others at most or all times.
Being somewhat aware, even remorseful but seldom in real-time when you realize a social indiscretion in whole or in part, but only after the fact.
It's just something I ponder from time to time, given how broad our traits and behaviors can be, and at different amplitudes. Though personally I find it difficult to really claim which condition is worse than the other. In essence, both can invite perpetual persecution and struggle for us on a daily basis.
What say you?
i have some girls (not many cause a lot hate me for unknown reasons) who are really good friends of mine but I find it in my mind I should not be talking to them at all anymore, why cause everyone of them tells me they have a boyfriend. Now when I hear that I try to be respectful and to give her some space. I’ve never had a girlfriend so I kind of don’t know what that is like but is it wrong to still be friends with a girl even though she has a boyfriend? I just feel weirded out by it and not know how much to explain it.
The thing that aggervates me is when one of the girls who is a good friend of mine says she will always be there when I need something or what not but yet she talks about her boyfriend and always hangs with him. So my question is should I not hang around the women who have boyfriends?
The thing that makes me upset sometimes is when I see everyone have each other which kind of aggravates me as well. I could care less but for some reason I just get emotional by it...
Before I delve into the pond of issues (very few now compared to the past though still plenty rough times), I want to mention that he has restrained interests, though his interests are about 3 major ones, and others (2) not as deep but he can get into easily. Not sure if that fact points there are enough to make HFA (the branch, not the type) or it's just Asperger's. (yeah, I know now in some countries it's no longer with categories, just ASD, but this is something I really want to know) I can't easily talk about his autism with him because he gets veeeery unstable and tells me I'm trying to treat him like a patient rather than a lover (it's totally not my intention, just very hard to find a way to discuss and I think hes not liking the topic itself).
Main issue that bothers me currently (and him if I had to guess) is his sudden loss of patience over questions, things I say, things he misunderstands that I say. He said he doesn't have as much patience with people, which's always...
we have a shower with a detachable spray nozzel in our home. i have taken to placing the metal flexiable tubing to both my ears and listening to the sound of the water passing through it. with both ears covered, it is a all consuming loud, low frequency sound that is almost euphoric to listen to. just today, i made the conection between this sound, and the one of the passing trains that i used to listen to as a young kid.
sounds can be bad, but some can be comforting and plessurable to listen to. water running over rocks in a river, trees moving with the wind, the list goes on but my tired brain cant continue.
what are your good sounds?
This quote does not reflect the main point of the article, but it reflects a perspective that iI wish more people shared (emphasis mine):
It is important to recognize that better assessment and a greater focus on skill-building will not eliminate adaptive functioning difficulties among autistic adults. Autism is a lifelong developmental disability, and most autistic adults need regular support in one form or another for the rest of their lives. And that’s okay.
From research on individuals with intellectual disability, we know that even among those who need significant day-to-day support, a high quality of life and positive outcomes, such as life satisfaction, happiness and successful employment, are still possible9,10. There is no reason to think autistic people are any different.
It is nice to see "life satisfaction" and "happiness" treated as their own measures of...
I don’t profess to possess all knowledge when it comes to mental health issues, nor am I well-read like many in our community; but based on my personal experiences and what I have seen, I can’t help but wonder if the so-called mental health professionals have failed those on the spectrum. Please allow me to elaborate.
One of my coworker’s favorite phrases is, “It’s like a backyard football game; they change the rules whenever they like.” That seems to be the case for the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM). The DSM-IV recognized Asperger’s, but the DSM-V does not. Each of us remains the same, but their rulebook has changed.
I also see how the treatment of those on the spectrum is different today than a few years ago. The understanding of the disorder is greater, but in many ways the treatments or therapies have not improved. In fact, it seems as though they do not actually help those on the spectrum but rather inhibit potential growth. That has been my experience....
does my microwave really need a beeper for everytime i push the button? does it need to constantly remind me over and over that my food is ready? i heard it the first time. do mobile apps really need those flashing colours and loud noises? do the people on the bus have to have them turned all the way up when playing the apps? Do pedestrian lights really need to beep when it is time to go? who is it helping anyways? (joke)
so much stuff makes noise these days, when really (to me) it shouldnt. appliances, kids toys, viechles, people, the list goes on.
I get that some stuff has to make noise, but it doesnt annoy me any less. this world is a noisy place. there is no escape...
what things just annoy the hell out of you because of the noise it makes and the reason it makes it? my microwave is on the too of the list right now.
I had been in therapy on and off in my 20's and early 30's and one therapist even said to me, that I do not need one, as I well able to be my own therapist and I came to the conclusion that really, the best therapist was myself, because I tend to be brutely honest with me.
Well, having moved to a different country and coming face to face with more challenges and the reality is that I need an official diagnosis of SOMETHING, it prompted me to seek out a psychiatrist for the first time ever and the first visit did not really go that bad, accept that he has made a conjecture and I have to now sort that out.
The problem I am faced with, is that every thing he says, I already know and not sure I can sit there and make out that I am ignorant.
The only thing "going" for me, is that he does not speak English and thus, my husband has to do most of the talking, so for once, I realised that I had to sort of "tutor" my willing husband on what to say and I give that man credit, he is being...
I've been practicing Radical Honesty for 20 years, and like most people who take up honesty as a spiritual practice am fairly shitty at finding and staying with the truth. So hearing about the inextricable link between Aspies and honesty appeals no end to me.
I'm reading a lot of websites, and one thing I can't get my head around -- Autists are reputed to be paragons of no-holds barred honesty, at the same time they lead lives of absolute deception, which they admit in their own words.
I don't get the contadiction. Does it change depending on the power dynamics? In other words, when an Autist is safe at home with their spouse are they more than happy to boldly say her butt looks big in those jeans? But when engaging with mythical sea creatures known as NTs they will laugh at jokes they find offensive and feel victimized by it. Agree with ideas they later post contempt for, but felt they had no choice in the matter. How horrible this must feel.
This seems real unhealthy to me,...
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