Welcome to Autism Forums, a friendly forum to discuss Aspergers Syndrome, Autism, High Functioning Autism and related conditions.Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
- Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
- Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
- Private Member only forums for more serious discussions that you may wish to not have guests or search engines access to.
- Your very own blog. Write about anything you like on your own individual blog.
We hope to see you as a part of our community soon! Please also check us out @ https://www.twitter.com/aspiescentral
Asperger's & Autism Forum
Is anyone else really forgetful when it comes to names? I mean, I've never been any good with names. I usually have a hard time remembering people's names unless they're someone I see on a daily basis. And even then, I still tend to call people by the wrong name. Or I just flat out forget the person's name all together, which makes for an awkward dance of me trying to avoid asking them, "I'm sorry, but what's your name again?"
I'm not sure if this could be spectrum related or if I just have a memory lapse when it comes to people's names, but this isn't getting any better. It's gotten to the point where I'll meet or be introduced to someone at work and as soon as they say their name, amid the handshaking or questions of what I do or where I'm from, I immediately forget the person's name that was just mentioned a few seconds ago. And no matter how hard I try to remember, I just draw a blank.
I've tried doing the name association thing where you associate a person's name to...
I was wondering if any of you felt the need to explain processes in certain situations. I do, and it typically gets a response from my NT coworkers or boyfriend that is light years away from my intention.
Here are two instances:
- I've tried explaining that I may have difficulties with certain tasks, or that I processed information differently and needed a few particular steps taken (such as being given ample time to write down instructions, or requesting to be exempt from acting as the note-taker in meetings because I can't handle several people talking at the same time, and my coworkers just loooooove to chat during meetings). I've also tried to explain meltdowns to my boyfriend when we moved in together after more than a decade of occasionally seeing each other, naively thinking that it could help avoid situations that cause the meltdowns in the first place.
In all of these cases, the response I got was that I "should not hide behind the condition and let it define me" --...
During my counselling session today I mentioned that when I ask an NT something their response appears to me to be in one of two ways:
1. They respond to what I have asked directly, or they attempt to understand what I have asked
2. They believe I am asking the wrong question or am seeing things the wrong way. They believe that I need to change the way I think before they will answer my question.
My counsellor and I both agree the second one of these responses is a result of people being ignorant about Asperger Syndrome, and a result of people being unaware that some people process things differently.
Just thinking about the second one of these responses makes me overcome with sadness.
I wondered if others here also find NTs respond like this?
A few seconds ago, my niece and I got to fighting. She was in my room and I didn't like it. My mother/her grandmother recently set up a bed in HER own room. I asked her over and over why she chose mine instead of hers. "Because I can."
One mean joke and yelling later, I threaten to beat her. The niece insists she could beat me in a fight. Keep in mind: She's eight years old. No, she's not physically superior to me. It's because it's been drilled in my head NOT to hit other people. ESPECIALLY not little kids.
Imagine if my mom and my brother weren't around. Imagine if I didn't have a strict moral code. I would beat the everloving snot out of her without a second thought. I'm FAR from weak. Lazy, yes. But not weak. I punched TWO girls is second grade. I broke a window WITH my hand without a single cut.
I'm NT but my dad had AS and I'm an advocate for ASD colleagues at work.
Right now, I'm working on a project to develop the behaviour of managers so they can encourage and support their teams to show their talents and be very productive. We want people to enjoy coming to work and be very innovative.
I'm lucky because my employer is very supportive of people with ASD and I have an opportunity to work with our Autism Lead Manager to develop some ideas to help people with AS / ASC / ADHD to feel comfortable, focused, happy and productive.
I know appraisals or face to face meetings with a manager can be really stressful! Also, team meetings and noisy workplaces can bring on overload.
Please can you help me by suggesting some things that motivate you or help you to enjoy your job?
Do you like systems best?
Do you like pictures and visuals?
Do you like thank yous?
Do you value one to one meetings with your manager or do you find these stressful?
Thank you for your help and expert...
I think the title says it all.
Realistically speaking, why are you in the relationship you're in?
a. Out of love. (Please explain)
b. Out of obligation. (Maybe for your kids or you've been together for a long time and it's just not fair to them to leave?)
c. For fear of being alone. (You don't think you can manage on your own or you've been depending on them for too long or you just fear you won't find anyone else?)
Do you like to collect anything? I've always been obsessed with collecting things. When I was little little I had a collection of rocks and feathers I found out in the yard.
When I was a little older I went crazy collecting Pokémon cards, I still have them all (1996-2007) tens of thousands, I had to stop, there were just too many, we're getting more expensive and I wasn't having anyone to play with anymore.
I also avidly collected comic books, Archie's Sonic the Hedgehog and all their spin offs (Knuckles, Tails, Sonic X, etc), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Also I had a lot of random series plus several Batman and many things that just looked interesting. I try not to ever miss Free Comic book day (it's coming up!!). Recently I started collecting the My Little Pony books though I miss a lot since there are no nerd stores convenient too me. Though when I go I always get my kid a few of the 1$ bin Spidermans or something.
I also have a pretty big collection of Pokémon...
Lately i have been considering just going mute.
I think in doing this would solve so many problems, no more dealing with the social niceties, or any social aspects. I do try to be social, especially since my job requires it, but i can never do it right. Meaning i always get complants (within the job), which to me are about pointless things, like not greeting someone made them feel unwelcome even though they are being hypocrites as they didnt greet me either, difference is i really dont care if people greet me or not. I tend to not initiate conversations (which gets me the complaints of 'you never say anything if we dont say something first'), i wait so i can respond in the same manner. For example, someone says hi to me, i say hi back, they say good morning, i say morning back. I even get complaints when i take initiate and say hi to people first, as they then respond in a very judgemental tone because i didnt say it 'properly'.
So my point is no matter what i do, what...
Page 109 of 162